The mother of invention

Daniel with his invention.

The 2-person snowboard.

As you all know, the Olympics are in full force. With that theme running rampant, Daniel has invented the new 2-person snowboard. He is so excited and wants me to send it to the Olympic committee for consideration. I actually think he might be onto something here but he may have a few design details to work on as the model is constructed with Legos.

Unrelated thoughts

• If women with big boobs work at Hooters, where do people with one leg work? IHOP (overheard on a sitcom)
• Ever notice how many old men drive around delivering car parts?
• Speaking of old men, they will be out in their little, old, tucked-away for the winter convertibles soon.
• A colleague uttered some expressions I had never heard of before: 'Off like a prom dress' and 'Smooth as toast'. O.K. I get the toast one, it's sarcastic as toast is not smooth but naive me is wondering about the dress. Does this expression mean things go v. quickly or v. slowly?
• When Daniel found a stray toy sheep under the couch, he said, "Hey look it's the sheep from my Jesus kit" - meaning the creche etc. His expression reminded me somehow of the G.I. Joe kits boys used to have when I was little.
• Tiger's apology was SO pathetic, robotic . . .fall from grace ain't pretty.

Random thoughts of greatness

This guy doesn't look like he could hurt a fly - right?!

Toto looking particularly cute after a haircut/wash and probably blow dry.

• When discussing heated car seats with Michael, he explained they are pretty neat only his butt doesn't get cold.
• My mother sent me a check for $22.70 - for the gas I put in her car during a visit a month ago. How she knows/remembers the amount is bewildering to me, as I paid in cash and she can't turn her neck very well.
• As my watch reflected on the ceiling the other day, I was reminded of school days and watch reflections on the teacher's back and blackboard etc. Kids could drive the teacher's crazy with this simple act of mischief, but not me - I was a pretty straight arrow.
• Michael woke up almost a whole hour early one day this week and when I heard the shower going, I too got up. Of course with no clock in the bedroom, I figured it must be time to get up. No. When Michael realized his mistake, he went back to bed for a good half hour. This was after showering and getting dressed. That is a TALENT I do not possess.

Dog Whisperer

The boys, at least a couple of them, actually thought that Cesar Milan aka. The Dog Whisperer was coming to our house. It was not that dog whisperer but rather the dog trainer from obedience class. Why? Toto the dog grabbed the cleaning woman's shirt tail in a growling, menacing way. She said she didn't do anything and she probably didn't. She was simply dusting.

Prior to that, Toto growled at and clamped onto the arm of one of Michael's friends who luckily had his coat on. Kudos to the friend who remained very calm and simply said, "He just bit me."

Both of these incidents happened near the front door.

In an effort to socialize Toto, I took him to the bus top. As the kids flooded off the bus, he cowered as a girl began to smother him with petting. My mistake. I should have read the signs. He snapped, attempted to bite the girl, as I snapped him back with the choke collar and smacked him on the underside of his mouth. Mistake number 2.

The dog trainer explained a violent reaction is very bad because the dog associates this with the human also being agitated by the threat. In other words, it is O.K. for me (the dog) to react that way. The other two incidents cited above were also accompanied by violent reactions by us owners. What can I say? It's kind of a natural reaction to protect fellow humans.

The trainer recommended a management plan and work to desensitize him. She recommended treating him with food when people are around. When the trainer arrived, I had Toto sit and asked him to stay (not sure he did), while I got the door. She immediately began to ply him with cheese. He was absolutely fine with her, as you can imagine. She said we could work to desensitize him to people by standing a distance way with Toto on the leash and gradually approaching the people, while continually treating him. This can be done in places with people, like soccer games etc. I'm not sure if we are ready for that yet. . .As for management; she said to tether him to a door when people arrive and to crate him when guests are in the house. Doug wasn't all that impressed with the advice. I guess he thought the whisperer would sweep in with magic and secrets and solve the problem.

Dogs are socialized at 8-12 weeks old. We don't know what happened to little Toto but he obviously does not take to strangers well. Off leash, when he can get way, he's fine and typically doesn't get too close. Though two women have managed to pet him of late on our graveyard walks. So there is hope. He might just need more socializing. But when he feels boxed in or threatened, he will react. And I'm not sure we can change that. DID I MENTION HE WAS FINE FOR OVER 6 MONTHS AND HAD NO AGRESSIVE BEHAVIOR OF ANY KIND?? He's also fine with other dogs.

Perhaps a kiosk by the front door filled with cheese for visitors to dispense at will. Our whisperer said she brings treats with her everywhere she goes.